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Parenting
Your
Teenager:
How to Have
a Successful
School Year:
7
Secrets that
Parents Need
Here's a
list of the
top seven
things you
as a parent
can do to
make this a
successful
school year.
Ø Create
an
environment
at home that
models a
love of
learning.
How often
have your
children
seen you
reading?
Heard you
talking
about
something
you have
learned?
Discussed
ideas and
issues with
them? While
these are
things to
have started
from day one
with your
child, you
can still
implement
them in your
home now.
Ø In
whatever way
works for
you, make
sure your
teen knows
that
while grades
are vitally
important,
they are
more
important to
you
than their
grades.
That's the
number one
thing I hear
from kids
when
I ask them
what gets in
the way of
talking
about school
with their
parents.
Ø This
one is so
simple yet
so profound.
Ask them
their
opinion on
important
issues of
the day. You
may
surprised
to find out
what kind
of brain
they have in
there.
Ø Make
sure there
is nothing
blocking
your
teenager
from
learning.
One example
of a block
to learning
could be a
learning or
information
processing
disorder, or
something
like
Attention
Deficit
Disorder.
Many
teenagers I
work with
that have
difficulty
with school
have
undiagnosed
ADD or ADHD.
Another
block to
learning can
be the use
of alcohol
and drugs.
Part of
the process
of drug
abuse is
that kids
begin to
lose
interest in
things that
were once
very
important to
them. If
they are
drunk or
high in
school,
not only do
they not
want to
learn, they
can't.
Ø Know
the names
and
philosophies
of the
following
people who
influence
your child's
life: the
principal,
assistant
principles,
the guidance
counselor,
and most
especially
the
teachers.
Ø Take a
walk through
their school
one day. By
all means,
don't let
them see
you. The
reason I
suggest this
is parents
need to
understand
at an
experiential
level that
the school
world their
kids go to
each day
is nothing
like the
school world
we knew. Not
even close.
Even if it's
the same
school. Just
too much has
changed.
Ø If
discussion
about grades
has become a
battleground
during a
particular
time of day,
declare that
time 'off
limits' to
grade talk,
unless the
teen brings
it up. For
some
families
that time is
the care
ride home,
or right
after
school. For
many it's
the dinner
table. Many
families
have
reported
better
digestion
after
declaring
dinner time
off
limits to
grade talk.
Ø Once
you have
done all
this, simply
put them in
charge of
school.
What I mean
by this is
make them
responsible
for their
performance
at school.
This may be
particularly
difficult,
because this
can be one
of
those
situations
where things
may get
worse before
they get
better.
This is
especially
true if you
have been
pushing and
pushing the
last
few years.
There may be
a drop off
in
performance
as they
learn how
to be in
charge of
themselves
with school.
Wanting your
children to
excel in
school is a
good and
natural
thing.
There comes
a time when
the ball is
simply in
their court,
and it's up
to them. I
think the
most
important
thing for
parents to
remember is
that school
eventually
needs to
become more
important to
them than
it is to
you.
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